Dimensional Dallying
by sakura-charmed
Summary: Post BD. Me in Volturi?Edward as a human?The Cullens in Hogwarts?What in the name of Cliche was I doing in these AU's?Bella Swan, now Cullen-but-still-a-danger-magnet at your service.If you thought it was over, think again.A Parody with a Plot.
1. What happens after 'Ever After'

Hello! New story here. I hope that you would try it out. And please review if you liked it!

Summary: Post Breaking Dawn. Why do these things keep happening to her? Answering a call for help, Bella Swan (now Cullen), finds herself in various Alternative Universes where she meets different versions of herself and the others. Can she help these AU characters to get their happy endings and go back to her world in time? Or was she doomed to dally in parallel dimensions forever?

Disclaimer:Twilight, Wuthering Heights, The Land Before Time, Madagascar, Powerpuff Girls, Sailor Moon, The Incredibles, Toy Story, and Dora the Explorer are not mine. The plot is mine, however.

* * *

"_How many possible worlds are there? In what respects do they vary, and what is common to them all? Do they obey a nontrivial law of identity of indiscernibles? Here I am at a disadvantage compared to someone who pretends as a figure of speech to believe in possible worlds, but really does not. If worlds were creatures of my imagination, I could imagine them to be any way I liked, and I could tell you all you wished to hear simply by carrying on my imaginative creation. But as I believe that there really are other worlds, I am entitled to confess that there is much about them that I do not know, and that I do not know how to find out."_

-David Lewis, on 'Modal Realism'

Does that mean that alternative universes exist? Interesting…

* * *

"_My love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath – a source of visible delight, but necessary. Nelly, I am Heathcliff – he's always, always in my mind – not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself – but as my own being – so, don't talk of our separation again – it is impracticable; and – "_

"Bella? Would you like to go shopping?"

I looked up from the book I was reading and raised an eyebrow at the petite, dark-haired pixie bouncing on her heels and waiting for my answer.

I sighed. Did she really need to ask me that question?

"No thanks, Alice," I replied, idly turning the pages of my brand-new copy of _Wuthering Heights. _"I have vampire flu. It's contagious. The voodoo doctor told me no shopping for as long as I could live – which is a very long time, practically forever."

"But -"

"Come Alice. Bella doesn't want to go," a beautiful blonde vampire popped out of nowhere and dragged my psychotic – I mean, psychic – sister away. "There is a new Gucci bag I want you to see. It would be a good birthday present for me, don't you think?"

Rosalie ushered her away before she could protest. I flashed her a grateful smile, which she returned.

Huh. Who would've thought that Rosalie and I could ever be on such good terms? Not me, for sure.

The door closed after them, but not before I heard Alice yell.

"But vampires don't get flu!"

I snickered and continued reading.

" '_May she wake in torment!' he said, with frightful vehemence, stamping his foot, and groaning in a sudden paroxysm of ungovernable passion. 'Why, she's a liar to the end! Where is she? Not there – not in heaven – not perished – where? Oh! You said you cared nothing for my sufferings! And I pray one prayer – I repeat it till my tongue stiffens –Catherine Earnshaw, may you not rest, as long as I am living! You said I killed you – haunt me, then! The murdered do haunt their murderers, I believe – I know that ghosts have wandered on earth. Be with me always – take any form – drive me mad! Only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! It is unutterable! I cannot live without my life! I cannot live without my soul!"_

Poor Heathcliff – he was such a passionate reckless man; and his love for Catherine doomed everyone to suffer. Although asking for a dead loved one to haunt you was downright creepy.

"Ha! I'm totally kicking your ass, dude!"

I glared at yet another interruption to my reading, courtesy of the big, hulking mass of muscles sitting in front of the telly. I winced from the decibel of his yell, covering my sensitive ears gingerly.

"Keep it down, will you?"

"Sorry, little sis," Emmett said, his eyes glued to the screen and his thumbs pressing furiously at the joystick of his new play station. "I can't help it. Jasper's totally eating my dust!"

The empathy at his side gave an offended sniff, but otherwise said nothing.

"…_I peeped in. Mr. Heathcliff was there – laid on his back. His eyes met mine so keen, and fierce, I started; and then, he seemed to smile. I could not think him dead – but his face and throat were washed with rain, the bedclothes dripped, and he was perfectly still…I could doubt no more – he was dead and stark!"_

Just then, my phone started to ring, the sweet notes of my lullaby playing.

"Aren't you going to answer that?"

I would know that smooth tenor anywhere. I stared up at the guy whose lap I was currently resting my head on. Not just any guy – Edward was watching me, his beautiful golden eyes was dancing in merriment while he toyed with the strands of my hair.

My breath hitched quite needlessly and if I were still human, I knew that my heart would pound a joyful, frenetic rhythm in my chest. I wanted to melt into a pile of goo at his feet, but for now, I was contented with the warm, fuzzy feeling inside me.

I can never tire of extolling his beauty…his perfection. Every time I see him, and be with him, I discover something new, something wonderful, and I find myself falling all over again for him.

It was worth it – all the pain, the fears I had to confront, and the challenges we had to endure. I would gladly face all of them again, if I would still be with him in the end.

I finally understood how Catherine felt – I _was _Edward, and my love for him does not merely resemble the eternal rocks beneath; no, my love for him is stronger, and he's in my mind as well as my heart.

It was not only because of his looks, though I must admit that it was the first thing that attracted me to him. It was the Edward underneath that glamorous appearance that completely ensnared me – everything about him: his personality, his interests, and even his faults and foibles.

My body was his when we first met. Then he captivated my mind, and took my heart for his own keeping.

My soul I offer to him myself – freely given.

Now I truly believe that 'happily ever-afters' can exist, and from it I had learned one important thing:

You have to be a vampire to become truly dazzled by _the_ Edward Cullen.

"Bella?"

Jerked away from my thoughts, I smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry," I murmured. "I was just thinking." My phone stopped ringing and I heaved a sigh of relief.

I really, really did not want to answer it.

"Are you going to read all that?" he asked, gesturing to the box at the foot of the sofa we were occupying, full of new reproductions of my favorite novel.

I dragged the box closer to me protectively. They were given as a peace offering from Alice, who had been so guilty for making me burn my dog-eared, well-loved book during the ' Volturi' incident. I've had that book for as long as I could remember, and when everything has calmed down, I couldn't help but feel a bit miffed for having to destroy it. I knew that it was necessary, but still…

Alice, of course, had 'foreseen' my reaction and went overboard, buying me every copy she could lay her hands on. Now I own a monopoly of _Wuthering Heights. _I don't think any library had _this _many copies of the same book.

"Yes, I will," I replied, resisting the urge to say 'duh.' "Why?"

"Well, I can think of other activities that would immensely please both of us…"

Me, being Oblivious Bella, did not catch up immediately. Activities? What –

Oh.

I thought for a moment and brightened up. It was so nice of him to ask! I feared that he had forgotten his promise to me, and since I was too shy to ask him again…

"Okay!" I replied, happiness and excitement bubbling inside me. I was glad that he reconsidered my idea to try new things. "As long as we could do it on your piano."

Silence.

I was absorbed in my book, so I hadn't seen his reaction. But when Emmett guffawed and even Jasper chuckled softly, I knew that there was something I had completely missed.

I sat up and placed my book carefully on the coffee table. Edward was boring holes into the two vampires with the heat of his glare. He was avoiding my eyes for some reason.

"I didn't know that Bella was so adventurous!" Emmett said, who now began to slap high fives with Jasper. "Took me a long time to persuade Rosalie to do that with me. On the piano. You're one lucky guy, Eddie my man!"

I didn't know that Rosalie and Emmett were that interested in doing it on the piano. But Edward said nothing, still attempting to incinerate his brothers through his eyes. If looks could kill…

I crossed my arms defensively, still at the dark as to why they were laughing like drunken idiots.

"Why? What's wrong with Edward teaching me how to play 'Bella's Lullaby on his piano?" He had started teaching me how to read notes a few days back.

Their laughter ceased immediately, as if someone had rained on their parade. By their sudden, shocked silence, I think that it was not just a light drizzle - it was an outright hurricane.

"You mean that's it?" Emmett said incredulously. "There was nothing suggestive about what you said? That it was a completely honest and innocent statement, brought about by your wish to play the piano and nothing else?"

Wow. Who knew that Emmett could talk without sounding like an idiot? No offense meant.

"What else could it be?" I asked, annoyed by their odd behavior.

"We thought that you wanted to play with something else," Jasper replied slyly.

Siding with Emmett was completely out of character for Jasper, but I still couldn't get what they were trying to tell me 'discreetly.'

"Play with what?"

"Do I need to spell it out for you, little sis?" Emmett drawled. "It's something long, something hard, and something –"

I covered both of my ears with my hands to block out what Emmett said next. Whatever it was, I knew that it wouldn't be appropriate for General Audience viewers. Or readers. It finally dawned on me this time.

"Men!" I complained ruefully. "Are people of your gender always this one track-minded?"

My two brother-in-laws exchanged glances with each other, all thoughts of play station forgotten. After a while, Emmett shrugged.

"I mean, it's not even possible. Hormones are released in the preparation for copulation, and are conveyed to different parts of the body through the bloodstream. I'm pretty sure that the heart is needed somewhere in the operation. How come vampires still have the raging libido of a living being?"

"You'll have to ask Carlisle for that," Emmett replied. "But you're certainly not complaining about Edward's libido, aren't you, little sis?"

_I was not embarrassed, I was not embarrassed…_ but from Jasper's smirk, he could probably feel that I was dying from humiliation. Figuratively, I mean.

Edward was strangely silent all this time and I turned to him, who might be the only sane person in this room aside from me.

"Please tell me you weren't thinking along the same lines as them, Edward," I pleaded.

He cleared his throat cautiously, still not meeting my eye.

"That is a matter of discretion," he replied carefully.

I rolled my eyes. I had been with him enough to know that was one of his secret codes for 'Yes, I am randy idiot and was thinking of that too.'

And inevitably, what he said made the other two occupants of the room burst into hysterical laughter. Edward finally looked at me, asking for apology in his stare.

Which of course I gave immediately. I couldn't resist those soulful, golden eyes.

"I'm going to hunt," I said. I hadn't hunted for days, and the burning at the back of my throat was getting hard to ignore.

"I'm coming with you," Edward replied promptly.

"No, that's okay," I went to the door, ignoring Jasper's and Emmett's hysterics. It wasn't even that funny! "Take care of Renesmee, will you? Last time I saw her, she was playing _Little Red Riding Hood _with Jacob, and he's enjoying playing 'the wolf' too much."

I don't even want to think what would happen when she would 'play' with Jacob when she grows up. Shudder.

Edward nodded, and I closed the door.

"Pity," he muttered to his brothers. "I've always wanted to do it on a piano."

Being the imbeciles they were, Jasper and Emmett laughed some more.

* * *

I did not know why I was feeling edgy these days.

It started as an itch at the back of my neck. Vampires don't get itches, but I do. When I had been human, the 'itch' used to inform me that something bad was bound to happen, and I learned to trust this weird premonition, since it always came true.

I smell trouble. And trouble seemed destined to find me. It was like that there was a Global Positioning System built inside me that makes trouble find me very easily.

I tried to convince myself that it was just my imagination. After all, I had already achieved my 'happy ever-after.' Surely, only good days are ahead of me?

But the feeling of foreboding did not go away.

I believe that my unease started on my 'deathday party.' Alice had read in some book where the living dead celebrate the day of their death, and she wanted to do it too. Knowing that there was no way to change her mind, I went along with her plan.

And when I was about to blow the candles on my 'deathday cake,' discontentment flowed through me and I found myself wishing for one last adventure before I could finally retire to my 'little piece of forever.'

I regretted it immediately. What more could I ask for? I had Edward, Renesmee, and the rest of my family. There was no sense for me to be dissatisfied. But I still felt as if I had business I was not done with, and I wished to finish it to rid myself of my restlessness.

Fool that I was, I had not heeded one of the wisest rules in time:

_Be careful what you wish for…_

I stopped and let my surrounding overcome my awareness. It always amazed me how keen and sharp my senses have become – how I could see every little dewdrop speckling on every leaf, how I could hear every little rustle from miles away…and how the wind caressed my skin without me feeling the cold.

A twig snapping behind me caught my attention. The sensation of being watched by someone unknown and someone powerful bombarded me again. My predatory instincts took over.

Just when a little doe stepped over the clearing where I was about to attack it, my phone rang again, scaring the poor animal away from certain doom. To my utter annoyance, it also effectively broke through the thick haze of my bloodlust.

Whose bright idea was it to bring the stupid phone anyway?

Oh, right. Mine.

Whoever was calling better be important, or there's no knowing what could happen to the pathetic gadget in my grasp. I've realized that throwing things does wonders to my temper. Not that my shrink would recommend it as an effective method for anger management.

I fingered the edge of my pocket hesitantly. What if it was another of those prank calls I had been receiving? Lately, random people I know from Forks High School began calling me. Which was downright fishy, because the only people I was truly close to in school were the Cullens and Angela.

Heck, even Lauren Mallory called me. I knew at once that it wasn't really her because she was too nice on the phone and talked to me like an old friend.

Which Lauren Mallory won't ever, ever do in a million years.

And every call I received had something in common: they all asked for my help.

That was why I started bringing my phone with me wherever I go. I didn't want my family to think that I have weird stalker and worry needlessly.

Flipping the cover open, I glanced at the screen and gave a guilty wince.

_Angela._

I had not contacted her for months – my quiet, wonderful friend who stuck with me through thick and thin, and even when I wasn't being much of a friend to her. Of course it was too dangerous to talk with her back then, what with the Volturi and everything. How she must think wrongly that I was ignoring her!

I was going to renew my friendship with her. The phone was still incessantly ringing, but now, with no traces of earlier reluctance, I pushed the receiver button and brought the speaker near my ear.

"Hello?"

_"Good morning starshine! The earth says hello!"_

What?

"_Don't step on a crack, or you'll fall and break your back!"_

_"_Are you okay, Angela?"

"_I feel like a mile-high, pastrami on rye on the fly from the deli in the sky! _I'm quite okay, Isabella._"_

Was Angela taking a course on insanity? Or was it -

"Is this really you, Angela?" Something fishy was going on. This _was_ a prank call, I was sure of it.

"Yes, it is I," the voice replied. "I am you friend Angelica."

"Who is this?" I demanded furiously, earlier irritation returning with full force. The call was from Angela, she sounded like Angela, but whoever it was didn't talk like Angela. "You're not Angela. You even got her name wrong."

The girl on the phone gave a nervous giggle.

"What are you talking about, Isabella? I am your friend. You even introduced me to your daughter. Such a cute little girl."

The real Angela _didn't _know about Renesmee.

"Look, whoever you are," I said, rubbing soothing circles on my head with a hand. I would be the first vampire in history to have an involuntary headache if this kept up.

"If you're going to pretend to be my friend Angela at least get her name right, okay?" Maybe the impostor was an escapee from a mental hospital. But that still didn't explain how she knew me. Or Renesmee.

A pause on the other line.

Then she sighed.

"You totally didn't believe for one second that I was your friend Angelique, did you?"

"Angela," I corrected. "And no. My friend doesn't call me by my full name. Plus, you sound too crazy to be her, whoever you are."

"You weren't convinced one tiny bit?"

"No," I retorted a little harshly. I was thirsty, I wanted to go home, and was talking to a psycho on the phone pretending to my friend, who may or not be a mental hospital escapee. Can anyone blame me for being _slightly_ pissed?

"Oh."

"Now are you going to tell me who you are and why you're posing as Angela?"

"Yes, I will tell you who I am, Izzy-belly." My eye ticked at the nickname. How did she know what Renee used to call me? "Do you want to save the world before bedtime like a true powerpuff girl?"

"You're being weird again," I informed her needlessly. But she sounded serious. And she hadn't answered my questions!

"Please Izzy-belly, just say yes? I promise to stop prank-calling you ever again if you promise to help me."

So she's the one who was calling me using the identities of FHS students! I should have known. Lauren was way too nice when I talked to her on the phone. But why was she pretending to be my former classmates at school and phoning me, asking for my help? What did 'saving the world' entail? Why was she bothering _me, _of all people?

She probably took my silence as a yes, because she said, "Okay! It's a deal!"

Before I could get a word in edgewise, the stranger hung up. I placed the cell back in my pocket, bemused but largely relieved. Whistling cheerfully, I made my way back home, to continue living out my happy ever-after.

And the next thing I knew, I was being whisked away to who-knows-where.

* * *

Have you ever felt like your appendages are being pulled into several different directions, as if your hands and feet were tied to horses that were running at over sixty miles an hour?

That was how I was feeling right now. I was being propelled by various, unknown forces, and my body did not know which one to follow.

It might have happened in a split second, or maybe forever, but regardless of how long it took, the pain was agonizing. It was like being turned into a vampire again, minus the 'fire.' Sort of.

Then it stopped as soon as it started.

At that moment, vampire grace failed me, and I found myself sprawled over the floor in a bumbling heap. Good thing I didn't feel the impact.

I remembered closing my eyes, so it was the noise that greeted me first. Telephones – dozens of them rang simultaneously, putting my much-abused, sensitive ears at ill-ease. Why the hell does anyone need that many telephones?

And the smell – it reeked of days-old, stale coffee coupled with various unknown odors, which made my nose wrinkle in disgust. Not only was the room noisy, it also badly needed a housekeeper.

When I had (halfheartedly) convinced myself that I wasn't dreaming (I can't even sleep, for crying out loud!) and that yes, that crazy phone call from some chick pretending to be Angela had caused my current dilemma, I opened my eyes.

Of all the possible places in the world, I had landed in a cramped little office, which was really bizarre.

Had I been kidnapped? If so, what did they want from me? And, who is it? I can't imagine anything I have which would be valuable to anyone. No one could possibly be interested in me. No one except –

_The Volturi._

The idea alone gave me a chill. Were they that bothered about the existence of Renesmee? I thought that it was all 'water-under-the-bridge' now. They wouldn't hire a lunatic to kidnap me, right? And they had no ability to teleport anyone through the phone.

Do they?

A rat scampered along the cheap, checkered linoleum floor. I gave a shudder in disgust. I never liked those little buggers, and not even the strongest bloodlust could make me drink from them. That would be plain creepy.

The flickering fluorescent lamp above me sent distorted shadows along the yellowed, torn wallpaper plastered on the walls. It was the only source of light in the dim room. A Map of the World dominated a whole wall, with colored little tabs pinned on it in different places. The telephones I had heard were placed on a rickety table at the opposite end, next to a row of file cabinets. A door stood directly in front of me, but the absence of a doorknob disabused any intention of mine from escaping through there.

Dusting off the jeans I was wearing, I rose to my feet and turned around.

Just as I had presumed, there was a desk in a state of dishabille like the rest of the stuff in here. An assortment of clutter was on the surface – papers in untidy stacks, gum wrappers, half-eaten doughnuts, and in the midst of it all, was a brand-new, high tech laptop: so totally at odds with its decrepit environment. On the center of the table was a nameplate which read _Ms. Destiny A. Twurk _in cursive handwriting_, _and beneath it were the words: _Handler of Fates since the Fall of Man, Gen. 3:1, circa BC. _

"Welcome. I've been…expecting you."

I tensed. On a slow, unhurried motion the chair behind the desk swiveled on its wobbly hinges, the sound echoing despite the other noises. I prepared myself for whatever waited me…

And blinked.

The lights fully came on, and the person in front of me burst into laughter.

"Ha! You should've seen the look on your face! I make a good mafia leader don't I, Izzy-belly?"

I narrowed my eyes.

The girl looked barely in her teens. She was of shorter-than-average height, with frothy blonde curls and unusual violet eyes. Wearing formal clothing, she looked like a kid playing dress-up. The presence of a heartbeat suggested that she was human, but the pace was too fast in normal standards. Her aura had no traces of malice in it, but it still made me wary.

I did recognize the voice, though.

"You were the loony on the phone earlier, weren't you?"

"And you must be Isabella Marie Swan-Cullen," she replied, as if being called a 'loony' was natural for her. She stood up and took my hand, pumping it enthusiastically.

"Vampirism looks good on you," she commented.

Wait a minute. How did she –

"I know everything about you," she continued, as if reading my thoughts. "I know that you were born to Charlie and Renee Swan, on September 13, 1987 in your time. I know that your first words were 'make me,' and that your first ever klutz attack involved peanut butter, your dog Heathcliff, a tray of ice, and – "

"Hold it!" Her extensive knowledge of my life unnerved me, and I didn't want to hear my embarrassing moments, thank you very much. "Who are you?"

"_I am Sailor Moon, the Champion of Justice!" _she declared. _"In the name of the moon, I will right wrong and triumph over evil!"_

The girl did some jerky movements with her hands that were sort of familiar.

"Damn, I can't seem to get it right," she muttered, repeating the routine again.

And completely ignored me. I crossed my arms and waited for her to stop.

"Look," I said, _almost_ getting to the end of my patience. " _That's so sweet, I'm getting cavities, but –"_

"I knew it!" she cried dramatically, bringing herself to her full height in 'righteous fury.' "You're not Isabella Marie Swan-Cullen, are you? You are Queen Beryl of the Dark Kingdom in disguise! I heard you say that in Episode 32 of the first season! _Well, better enjoy that laugh, Beryl. It's the last one you'll ever have! In the name of the moon, I will punish you!"_

She was insane, the poor dear. Was it contagious? If it was, I need to get out of here.

"_Sailor Moon _is just a television show, little girl," I said. " As you told me, I _am _Isabella Marie Swan-Cullen. You called me earlier to kidnap me, don't you remember?"

"I am no longer a little girl, Izzy-belly!" she complained. "I am over three millenniums, two centuries, and a year old!"

Not only was she crazy, but she was also stuck in the body of a snot-nosed brat? Poor dear. _The poor, poor dear, _as Esme would have said_._

"And I'm not really Sailor Moon," she confessed.

"I knew that," I replied flatly.

"I am Destiny A. Twurk, Twelfth Handler of Fates since the Fall of Man, Gen. 3:1 circa BC. You can call me Destiny for short."

"I knew that too."

"Really?" 'Destiny' asked, in an amazed tone. "How did you – "

I gestured to her table. "That was what is written on your nameplate, isn't it?"

"Wow, you're incredible!" she proclaimed, and I rolled my eyes in reply. For someone over three thousand years old, she sure can be really daft.

Offering me the visitor's chair, she took a seat behind the desk.

"Are you connected to the Volturi?" I prodded.

Destiny gave a vehement shake of her head.

"No. Whyever would you think that?"

"You're not telling me anything!"

"Hold your horses, Izzy-belly," she chided. "Didn't your mother tell you that good things come to those who wait?"

"Didn't_ your_ mother tell you that it is rude to kidnap a person without explaining why?" I shot back.

"Touche."

She folded her hands and said nothing, while I was swiftly loosing my patience. A girl has her limits, even a vampire one, you know.

"My name is Destiny."

"You already said that." She sent me a scathing glance for interrupting. "Sorry."

"It's not just my name," Destiny explained, twiddling a pen in her fingers absentmindedly. "It's my job too. I monitor the guardian angels" – she pointed to the World Map on the wall – "I receive the calls from Earth about the people who was born and died" - the ringing telephones made sense now – "And interview the souls who had expired on Earth before deciding to send them to Peter or Beelzebub. Heaven or Hell, you know. It's a very demanding job, with very few benefits."

"Okay…?"

"I also keep the files of every person in History – Past, Present and Future."

"Okay…?"

"It's like saving the world. _No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again! Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid! I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for…for 10 minutes! _I remember Mr. Incredible saying that in the movie._"_

"Okay…?"

"Anyway, Boss man had appointed me a few years ago, and he said that I was doing a good job. Of course, I wouldn't know if I would still be doing a 'good job' in the next few thousand years. That would be the time when I could take an apprentice who will succeed me. Which would be a total bummer."

"Boss man?"

She looked at me as if I had suggested that the moon was made of cheese.

"Doesn't ring any bells with you? Boss Man? The One in Charge? God? Allah? Jehovah? Yahweh? Whatever name you prefer. He believes in you, even if you don't believe in Him."

"Oh."

She leaned back in her seat and examined me critically.

"You're taking this remarkably well."

I shrugged. After encountering vampires and werewolves, and becoming one of the supernatural beings myself, nothing could surprise me that much. In fact, I had come to believe that anything was possible in the world.

"I'm still kinda leaning on the Insanity-theory, though" I felt compelled to tell her the truth. It takes time absorbing the idea of a television-crazed angel controlling man's fate. It still sounded rather far-fetched. "Do you want me to get a shrink for you? Is that why you asked for my help?"

I'm pretty sure that Carlisle had a degree in psychology tucked somewhere. Maybe he can psycho-analyse this psycho?

"You still don't believe in me, do you?" she accused.

"You have to admit, it sounds a tad crazy."

"Ah, but Izzy-belly, I brought you here because of your wish."

I sucked in a breath. The itch at the back of my neck came back again.

"What wish?" I asked sharply.

"You wished for one last adventure before you retire to your 'little piece of forever', didn't you?"

"How – " No one _knew _about that. Not even Edward.

"I know everything about you for I _am _Destiny," she repeated, smug at her success in convincing me of her identity. The cat-that-ate-the-canary expression on her face made me want to throttle her. "And now, I had come to ask for your help."

_Finally_ we were getting to the bottom of this.

"_This is an intergalactic emergency. I need to commandeer your vessel to Sector 12. Right now, poised at the edge of the galaxy, Emperor Zurg has been secretly building a weapon with the destructive capacity to annihilate an entire planet. I alone had information that reveals this weapon's only weakness."_

Just as I thought that we could finally have a decent conversation, Destiny would open her mouth and say something stupid.

I sighed. This would take a while.

"Sorry about that," she flushed. "Couldn't resist quoting _Buzz Lightyear – 'To infinity and beyond' _and all that. He rocks my socks!"

No wonder people had such messed-up lives, if such a fickle creature held their fates in her hands.

"Could you _please _just get to the point?" I complained. "I'm getting old here."

"Yes, yes," she grumbled. "Don't you have a sense of humor? It's as if something is stuck up your-"

"That's no angelic language, Destiny," I retorted smugly. "For god's sake please just-"

"_Thou shall not use the Lord's name in vain!"_ she screeched agitatedly, rising to her feet. Calming down after counting to ten, she resumed her seat. "Commandment no. 2. It bugs me like hell when others use coarse language, especially using His Most Holy Name."

"Pity there are no rules forbidding angels from using coarse language themselves," I drawled.

Destiny gave me a disgruntled look and blushed guiltily.

"Have you ever heard of Multiverse theories, Izzy-belly?"

I blinked, surprised at the sudden change of topics and answered her question with a question. "Why? Can't say I know much about it." Was it discussed in some Science lesson when I wasn't paying much attention?

"Well…Multiverse is a hypothetical set of multiple possible universes (including our universe) that together comprise all of reality. The different universes within the multiverse are sometimes called parallel universes. The structure of the multiverse, the nature of each universe within it and the relationship between various constituent universes, depend on the specific multiverse hypothesis considered. Multiverse is also known as 'alternative universes', 'quantum universes' , 'interpenetrating dimensions' , 'parallel worlds' , 'alternative realities' , and 'alternative timelines.'"

I blinked again, staring at her flushed face. Apparently, Multiverse stuff was her soap dish.

"Err…Could you explain that to me again? In English?"

Destiny rolled her eyes in a comical fashion.

"You weren't listening to me at all, did you?" I didn't answer, and she sighed. "It means that there are other worlds out there aside from your own."

"Oh. Why didn't you say so in the first place?"

She shot me an exasperated glare.

"Anyway. There are millions of parallel worlds out there. To take an example, every universe has its own version of you. But those Bella Swans are different from you – they had led different lives, different experiences from yours, and maybe some of them haven't even met their world's version of Edward Cullen."

Bummer for them. I can't imagine existing without my love. I'd rather be dead, for he was my life.

"And this involves me, how?"

"I need someone to save their worlds and help them get their 'happy ever-after."

"Why me? I can't remember anyone from another dimension coming to my world to save us. Why not let them achieve their happy endings on their own?"

To my surprise, a guilty flush colored her cheeks again.

"It was actually my fault," she admitted reluctantly.

"Your fault? What happened?"

"A few days ago, I was trying to clean up the clutter here," she said. "Spring cleaning? Well, I took out the papers from the File Cabinet and placed them on the floor. But I remembered an errand I haven't done yet, and stepped out, leaving the papers where I last put them. On the floor"

That didn't sound good. "Papers? The ones containing the life stories?"

"Yes," she agreed. "As it happened, I was arranging your files, Izzy-belly. And the files of the Bella Swans of the other worlds. I took really good care of them, I swear! I kept the door locked and everything when I left. But then - "

"Then what?"

"MydogChaosenteredthelockedandpeedonthefiles," she said in a rush.

"Your dog. Peed on the files. Files that contain life stories."

"Umm…yes? He…happened to eat a few of them as well."

I did not move, but she continued talking.

"Without these files, the other Bella Swans would continue living on uselessly, not knowing what to do next. Of all the documents, yours was the only one that wasn't peed or chewed on. You're very lucky."

I stared at her, at a loss for words.

"That's why I called you, pretending to be Michael or Laurena or Angelina…whatever their names were. I figured that you would be most likely to help your friends rather than a stranger like me."

Her hands trembled in nervousness.

"Izzy-belly, say something. Don't just stare at me as if you want to strangle me within an inch of my life." she giggled skittishly. "That was a joke, you know. You're not really going to strangle me, are you?"

I clenched my fists, for they were shaking in rage.

And then I smiled.

"Of course not, Destiny," I said sweetly. "Why in the world would I do that when I can just easily feed you to the piranhas? I'm pretty sure my brother Emmett has an aquarium of them somewhere. Or how would you like to be a dog's chew toy? My daughter would really love it if she saw you being chased around by her dog. Jacob wouldn't mind if he pretended to be a dog, seeing that he would do anything for my child. Would you like it if I plan out your 'destiny' for once in your life?"

"Woah, Izzy-belly," she placated, holding out her hands in surrender. "There's no need to get violent. After all, we are on the same boat here, right? I'll scratch your back if you'll scratch mine."

"How could you be so irresponsible?" I shot up to my feet, and paced to and fro. "Isn't your dog housebroken? I thought that you locked the door."

"I did!" she replied defensively. Then faltered. "At least, I think I did…I can't recall…"

I rolled my eyes. Can vampires get hypertension even without having blood?

"What if I don't help you?" I asked.

Her startled gaze shot up to mine.

"You wouldn't do that," she protested weakly. "For one, only I can send you back."

I couldn't refute that. But the unfairness of it weighed down upon me. Why me?

"And I know that you are a really good person," she said earnestly. "Inside and out. I can see how you would go to any lengths just to see the happiness of the people you care about. You might not know about the lives of the other Bellas and Edwards, but you couldn't bear to see people suffer if you know that you can do something to alleviate their pain."

She was playing the guilt-trip card on me, wasn't she? But already, I can feel the fight drain out of me.

In a way, she was right.

"And if God knows about what I have done," she continued softly. "If I don't do anything about it, He…wouldn't give me wings, for sure. I-I always dreamed of flying, and I am the only one in my age who doesn't have a pair of wings on my back."

I couldn't resist the watery Bambi-eyes. Alice knew it, and apparently, Destiny knew of my weakness, too. I sighed.

"How long will this take?"

Destiny brightened up immediately and gave me a big, grateful smile, but I was still too disgruntled at how easily she had manipulated me.

"Actually I have no idea." I was annoyed at her ambiguous answer, but said nothing. "Days? Weeks? Months? Possibly even years."

_YEARS???_ Was she kidding? If I would be gone for days, Edward might think…

I squelched that thought. I would make it up to him when I return.

"How could you possibly explain my disappearance to my family?"

"I'm sure that they would understand," she said airily. "Don't worry about it. I'll handle it. The faster you'll do this, the faster you would get home."

I let that matter go.

"How can I help fix these 'parallel dimensions?"

"It's really simple," she explained. "All you have to do is visit the ruined worlds one by one, find what's wrong, fix it, then return back here. To the headquarters for your next mission. You would know what to do when you get there, trust me."

That was possibly the vaguest instructions I have ever heard. Trust her? I'd no sooner trust Lauren to not stab my back than trust her. But what choice did I have?

"Wait! I have equipment here that could help you on your task." She reached underneath her desk and pulled out a purple backpack. I raised an eyebrow.

"What?" Destiny asked defensively. "There's nothing wrong with liking _Dora the Explorer, _you know. '_Swiper no swiping! Swiper no swiping! Swiper no swiping!' _always makes me laugh…"

I cleared my throat.

"Oh, right." From the knapsack, she pulled out a hand mirror, a flashlight, a bracelet, a mini-laptop, a wad of gum, and a potato.

A potato?

"My brother, Tekno Lugi A. Twurk, did these," she told me proudly. "He is a patented inventor. He makes very cool stuff, and I love him to bits."

"This," she held out the hand mirror reverently. It was made of pure gold, artfully designed, and the polished gems embedded around the reflective surface shone in the dim light. "Is a mirrors."

"I only see one mirror," I pointed out helpfully.

She shot me a 'shut up and listen' glare.

"No. It is a M. I. R. O. R. S." Now I heard the capital letters in her voice. "Which stands for 'Mirage Image Refraction Outlet Receptor System. It will help you don on the physical appearance of any person. Just simply gaze into it and think about his or her features and say the words 'Disguise On.' It wears off quickly, though. So you have to reapply it after an hour or so."

I picked up the flashlight and looked at it curiously.

"A flashlight?"

"Not just any flashlight," I handed it over to her and she flipped the switch on. "The EnFlash. The Flashlight of Enlightenment." Jeez, what a cheesy name.

"What does it do?"

"It lights up the path and reveals the truth for those who wish to seek it."

"No offense, but vampires are nocturnal creatures. We can see in the dark pretty well, you know."

"Oh? Then bring it with you, just in case." Destiny dumped it inside the ridiculous-colored bag.

The girl asked for my hand and tied the bracelet around it.

"This is a Kamilion 2.0. It will reinforce your shield and protect you not only mentally, but physically as well. It can help mask your sound, scent, and your visibility." I shook my hand and the different charms bumped against each other, making a faint tinkling sound. It was useful and trendy. Cool!

She handed me the mini-laptop which fit my hand.

"This is a P. D. A."

"Personal Data Assistant?"

"No."

"Public Display of Affection? After all, you did touch my hand."

"Now who's being foolish, Izzy-belly? You Earthlings think of the worst abbreviations! This is a P.D.A. – Portable Device Appendix. It will provide you further information about the dimension you will be visiting. It talks, so you don't have to worry about not knowing how to operate it."

"The gum?"

She took a stick of gum and popped it into her mouth. "This will help you emulate the voice of practically anyone with just a few chews. Plus it comes it different flavors."

She started talking to me in my voice, which was downright freaky, because she sounded just like me.

I hate gum, but-

"Do you have anything Edward-flavored?"

The blonde gave me a weird look.

"You're way too obsessed with him, in my opinion. No offense."

I shrugged. "None taken. You would be also, if you knew how hot he is."

I would probably be Edward's biggest stalker if I hadn't had the pleasure of being his wife.

"And the potato?"

"It has a microscopic surveillance camera installed in it, which you can monitor from your P.D.A."

Why a potato, though? But I kept my mouth shut, knowing that she would vent into another tirade of scientific jargon about it.

"All systems go? You brought your cellphone with you, didn't you?"

"You didn't give me a choice about it," I replied, remembering the horrible feeling of being 'teleported.'

"Good. Now, the next thing you need to do is dial my number, which I am sending you right now," a pink phone materialized in her hand, which she handled with the ease of a past master. After a moment, I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I took it out. "And when I pick up, say the words 'Mission Begin!"

She sat back down and opened her laptop.

_"Now, if you'll excuse me, I, Mojo Jojo have a town to take over. I have a world to conquer. I have to seize control of an area and force its inhabitants to follow my way of thinking…"_

I strapped the pack on my back numbly. This was it. I can do this in a jiffy and return home in record time. Edward and Renesmee and the rest wouldn't notice that I was gone, because I would be back before they can start to worry.

"Well, what are you waiting for? The worlds aren't going to save themselves. Go, go!"

"Destiny, wait! You haven't explained how I could get baaacckkkkkkkk!!!!!"

The feeling of being pulled into different directions came to me again and for the second time today, I was being whisked away.

I was still numb when I was dropped on the floor of a very familiar corridor – it was in Forks High School, I was sure of it.

I was trapped in a different dimension.

My family is in a different world.

And I haven't finished re-reading _Wuthering Heights _yet.

What had I gotten myself in this time?

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What do you think? Should I continue? Please review!

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Preview of next chapter:

_In a sense of detachment, my eye roved around the cafeteria halls. Same old scene, same old tables with bubblegum glued underneath the surface. _

_I spotted my family seated at the usual table, minus one member aside from myself._

_Where was Edward?_

_The entrance to the canteen opened and I held my breath._

_Bronze hair, lanky form, fluid grace, and a pair of startling emerald eyes that were so familiar and still very foreign at the same time._

_I knew that they were supposed to be gold._


	2. World 1: Role Reversal

Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine. Only the plot.

Please review!

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_1st Main Tenent of David Lewis' Modal Realism: _Possible worlds exist – they are just as real as our world

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I'd forgotten how…tacky Forks High School looked like.

In the midst of the overabundant greenery that was Forks, the building's garish maroon bricks made the school a major eyesore. It was like staring at a bright red stain on a pristine white tablecloth until your eyes stung. It really just…stood out.

Or maybe it was just me. My insignificant human memories were rather vague, so to me, it was seeing FHS for the first time.

Why again had I agreed to do this?

I mean, I could be at home right now. I could be resting my head on Edward's lap, reading my _Wuthering Heights _novels, and watching little Renesmee grow. Relaxed. Calm. At peace. Living out forever as no one has ever done before.

Instead, I was in a different dimension that looked freakishly similar to my own, with no means of getting back where I came from.

And I had no stinking clue as to what to do next.

Was I supposed to go inside? I eyed the few cars in the lot speculatively. The sky was cloudy and thick with morning fog, so classes might not have started yet. It was cold, and there was no sign of life anywhere. The question was, should I go in as Bella and risk meeting the Bella of this world? Or should I impersonate some random person who would raise suspicion in a school small enough for everyone to know everyone else? Either way was bound to get me in trouble.

I cursed Destiny's horrid lack of instruction. Did she really think that I can pop in and out of these alternative universes and know exactly what I'm supposed to do to help?

I was disgusted with myself. Instead of choosing what was easy, I had to be a damned heroine in some cheesy novel and choose what was right. I could have said no to Destiny's crazy plan to 'save the worlds.' Why couldn't I be more like Catherine Earnshaw, the spoilt, selfish princess?

Sometimes it was a pain in the…behind to have a conscience.

Forks High School hovered in the corners of my vision, taunting me to go ahead with my foolhardy 'mission.' Going inside it even in my relatively newborn-vampire age was not a problem, despite the numerous humans lumbering about. Not only do I have unusual control at reining in my thirst for blood, I was actually allergic to the stuff.

And I found it out the hard way.

I remembered tasting human blood when I had Renesmee, and…wanted to try it again. For curiosity's sake. It was foolish, but I went along with my plan and snuck in to Carlisle's supply of blood and nicked one bag. No sooner had I taken a few sips when I barfed it all over Esme's lovely, _white _carpet.

Emmett couldn't stop laughing. Esme had such a disappointed look on her face that made me want to jump off a building in shame or, if not that, grovel on my knees until she forgave me. She was also an expert on using the 'Bambi eyes.' Luckily, Edward came to my rescue and bough Esme a new one. Carlisle was obviously interested in my _unusual case_ and I had no doubt that he would use me as a guinea pig if I didn't beat off with a hasty exit.

From that misadventure, I learned that human blood was like the air fresheners we see dangling on cars' rearview mirrors: it might look good, and smell awfully better, but you certainly couldn't eat it.

Why couldn't I be normal for once?

"If you won't stop gaping there like an idiot, people are going to think that you're crazy."

I jumped, startled. I had an affinity to display humanlike reactions, something I might've brought with me to the 'afterlife.' I glanced down at the gizmo I hadn't realized that was still in my grasp. 'P. D. A.' as Destiny called it but…

"You talk."

"Well of course I do. Didn't the great 12th Handler of Fates tell you? Or do you have selective hearing as well as an inclination for imbecility?"

…She hadn't warned me that the P. D. A. had an attitude.

Narrowing my eyes at it, I said, "I don't remember asking for your opinion."

"All the same, I was merely offering my assistance. Or is there a law forbidding against kindness for the unfortunate?"

The _unfortunate? _I could feel my temper soaring to new, indefinite heights I haven't experienced before. Its pompous, mechanical voice was grating on my nerves

"There are two kinds of help, _Podrean._ First is the _useful _help, and second is the _unwanted _one. Yours was more of the latter and less of the former."

A pause. And then, _"Podrean?"_

"Shortcut for 'Positively, Dreadfully Annoying.' That's what P. D. A. stands for, isn't it?"

Ha! Take that!

"Now I know why they call you _Bella." _Podrean announced.

"Why?" I asked warily.

"Because your Intellectual Quotient is clearly Below Average. Bel-A."

"Why you -" There were no appropriate words to describe this-this abomination!

"Don't worry, I'm sure that there might be someone out there who is more _positively, dreadfully, and annoyingly _dumber than you."

I saw red. I was about to put the end to its miserable existence when –

"Bella?"

I gasped, and whirled around.

In all her 4'11" stature, cropped hair and ballerina-like grace stood Alice.

Not _my _Alice, I grimly reminded myself. She was _the_ 'Alice' of this strange, strange world.

I quickly stuffed Podrean into my jeans pocket and looked at the arriving cars. Stepping out of a recognizable, shiny Volvo were 'Emmett,' 'Rosalie,' and 'Jasper.' They stared at me quizzically and I nodded my head at them.

It was weird staring at familiar faces of the people you know everything and nothing about.

I frowned. Where was 'Edward'?

I quickly returned my attention to the vampire who was watching me concernedly. Alice clearly knew 'Bella' and didn't think it odd that she was a vampire. My cover wasn't blown. Thank God for small miracles.

"Bella? I thought that you were in Alaska? I didn't _see_ you arriving anytime soon."

I mentally scrambled for a reply. The Bella of this world was a vampire and was in Alaska? What was she doing there?

"Not anymore," I replied carefully. The less words the better.

Alice looked skeptically at me.

"You said that you were having problems with your control with him here," she whispered. "Are you sure that you want to go back to school?"

_Control? Him? _What-?

"What in the world are you wearing, Bella?" she complained. "That shirt is so wrong with those jeans. I knew that you were going to be a fashion disaster without my help. I love the backpack, though. Where did you get it?"

I smiled at the sudden sense of normalcy.

No matter what world I was in, some things never change.

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_Chapter 3:_

The Bella of this world was a vampire, belonged to the Cullen clan, a loner, and a mind-reader. She was also having problems controlling her bloodlust with a certain newcomer to Forks High School - the Chief of Police's _son._

This was starting to sound familiar.


End file.
